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opethmike
10-25-2019, 10:52 PM
61513

Rich_NYS
10-27-2019, 08:16 PM
How do pickles enjoy their day off?

....They relish it.

Sent from my LGL164VL using Tapatalk

opethmike
10-27-2019, 09:20 PM
Yes! Lol!

Michael
10-27-2019, 09:42 PM
Why do you have to be careful when it's raining cats and dogs?

You might step in a poodle!

Hey I'm just kitten.

Parzival
10-27-2019, 09:45 PM
Where do Bees go to the bathroom?

At the Bee Pee station,

Hill Valley PD
10-28-2019, 07:44 AM
Why do cows wear bells? Cuz their horns don't work. - Rocky Balboa

Mark D
10-28-2019, 09:05 AM
Why do chicken coops only have two doors?

Because if they had four then they would be chicken sedans.

Ron
10-28-2019, 11:09 AM
What do you call a cow with 3 legs? : lean beef

What do you call a cow with no legs? : ground beef

What do you call a cow with 2 legs? : Your mom

Josh
10-28-2019, 11:15 AM
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? : Your mom

oof

bytes311
10-28-2019, 11:22 AM
Wanna hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy.

r00b
11-01-2019, 12:58 AM
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?


The wheelchair

r00b
11-01-2019, 01:08 AM
What did the blind man say to his dog when exiting the bus?


Step off, bitch

mr_maxime
11-01-2019, 09:07 AM
For those of you about to start holiday shopping that aren't sure what to get your loved ones, a severed foot makes the ultimate stocking stuffer.

Giamanut
11-02-2019, 06:02 AM
Who invented copper wire?
2 Lawyers fighting over a penny!

Spittybug
11-03-2019, 08:05 PM
A successful but burned out gynecologist decides to change profession and become a Delorean mechanic.

He takes the course, studies hard and takes the final exam that consists of putting back together a totally dismantled engine and getting K-Jet to run. He diligently performs the task and patiently awaits his grade In short order he is amazed to get the results of his test; a 150 score out of a possible 100! He could go work for Delorean Motor Company with that score!

While happy, he's curious how he got more than 100 on his test, so he asks his instructor. Paddy replies, "not only did you assemble the engine and get the notorious K-Jet PRV engine to run perfectly getting you the 100 score, but I gave you an extra 50 points because never in my life I have I seen anyone do it exclusively through the exhaust pipe!!!!!"

Pop, pop, bada boom!!!!!!!

Hill Valley PD
11-03-2019, 08:41 PM
A successful but burned out gynecologist decides to change profession and become a Delorean mechanic.

He takes the course, studies hard and takes the final exam that consists of putting back together a totally dismantled engine and getting K-Jet to run. He diligently performs the task and patiently awaits his grade In short order he is amazed to get the results of his test; a 150 score out of a possible 100! He could go work for Delorean Motor Company with that score!

While happy, he's curious how he got more than 100 on his test, so he asks his instructor. Paddy replies, "not only did you assemble the engine and get the notorious K-Jet PRV engine to run perfectly getting you the 100 score, but I gave you an extra 50 points because never in my life I have I seen anyone do it exclusively through the exhaust pipe!!!!!"

Pop, pop, bada boom!!!!!!!

I changed it to proctologist and laughed harder :)

Michael
11-04-2019, 07:39 AM
I changed it to proctologist and laughed harder :)

LOL...or change exhaust pipe to metering housing.

Delorean3610
11-09-2019, 09:41 PM
A grocery store manager hears a commotion over in the spice aisle, he walks over and finds his newest employee had spilled a large box of spices all over himself. The manager tells the employee to clean up his mess, and the employee responds: “Sure boss, I’ve got nothing but thyme on my hand.”

mr_maxime
11-10-2019, 09:04 AM
A grocery store manager hears a commotion over in the spice aisle, he walks over and finds his newest employee had spilled a large box of spices all over himself. The manager tells the employee to clean up his mess, and the employee responds: “Sure boss, I’ve got nothing but thyme on my hand.”

The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a well seasoned veteran